Category Archives: Blog

What I’m Thankful for – 2022 Edition

People nowadays just think of today as a day for food and football, but it’d behoove all of us to stop and be grateful. The last few months I’ve needed to remind myself of that. There are times it still does seem pointless, but it teaches you humility and, well, gratitude. So, here it goes.

  1. My faith in Jesus Christ.
  2. My family.
  3. My new church.
  4. My previous church (which is now closed).
  5. My apartment.
  6. My podcasts (The Monster Island Film Vault, Henshin Men, The Power Trip).
  7. That I’m a cast member on Power Rangers: The Audio Drama.
  8. My master’s degree.
  9. The jobs I worked this year.
  10. My car.
  11. My collectibles.
  12. My book collection.
  13. My DVD and blu-ray collection.
  14. Moses, the new family cat (he was rescued from a marsh).
  15. My friends.
  16. My gaming consoles.
  17. My phone.
  18. My laptop.
  19. That I got to meet some great celebrities, including Jason David Frank.
  20. My fans and readers.
  21. My websites.
  22. That I got to be a panelist at G-Fest.
  23. That conventions restarted in earnest this year.
  24. Movie theaters.
  25. Comic shops.

Why I’m Not at Gen-Con This Year

I’ve been a staple at Gen-Con, a massive four-day gaming convention in Indianapolis, for a decade. I’ve tabled in Authors Avenue in the vendor hall since 2020, but even then, I taught a pair of online panels in the free online version held during the off-year. I’ve networked with many authors there, sold hundreds (if not more) books there, expanded my readership there, and met some amazing friends there.

But this year, I’m staying home. In fact, I canceled my vendor hall table in June.

Why? I’m not allowed to be there. Not because of something I did, but because of something I didn’t do.

This year Gen-Con required COVID vaccination cards to get in the door. This decision wasn’t finalized until two months before the convention. I’d reserved a table in February. I only got half of my money back when I canceled—because I’d chosen not to get vaxxed.

Before I continue, let me make several things abundantly clear:

  • I am not anti-vax.
  • I am not anti-science.
  • I have simply chosen not to get the vaccine. I’m admittedly a little hesitant with how fast the vaccine was produced, but I’m incredibly healthy and hygienic. I’ve gone for 2 ½ years without getting COVID (unless I was asymptomatic).
  • I’m not here to argue about the medical science of COVID and the vaccine. That invariably turns into a quagmire because everyone can site sources that seem to back up their position. Honestly, the science is immaterial to the issue with Gen-Con.

What I will argue is still potentially dangerous. I could lose readers and/or friends over it. (Welcome to the world we live in). It might even be considered grounds for “cancelation.”

But I must speak up.

This vax card requirement by Gen-Con makes no sense. The COVID-19 pandemic is over, for all intents and purposes. In my home state of Indiana (where Gen-Con is held, in case you forgot), we have returned to what feels like 90-plus-percent pre-2020 normal. Last year, Gen-Con held a half-size show while the pandemic was ongoing but subsiding. Precautions were taken, such as requiring masks. It was “diet Gen-Con” in many ways, but I can vouch for it being a success. Heck, I made more money in Authors Avenue than I ever had before! I expected Gen-Con would relax their restrictions in 2022.

Instead, they’ve done the opposite.

Why?

I suspect politics.

It’s no secret that Gen-Con’s management are leftists. In 2015 when then-governor Mike Pence signed the Religious Freedom Restoration Act, the CEO of the convention threatened to break contract with the city of Indianapolis and move the show out of state in protest. Thankfully, that didn’t happen, but it showed the organization’s true political colors. Now politics are influencing how they manage their business. It’s at best misguided virtue signaling and at worst a thinly veiled attempt to identify the political demographics of Gen-Con’s customer base and, I would argue, bar some from attending based on those politics. The problem is some people—such as several members of my family—haven’t gotten the vaccine because of their politics but because of pre-existing health conditions that would be aggravated by the vaccination. Why should such people be prohibited from attending Gen-Con along with the “evil” antivaxxers if they want to be there?

This decision makes Gen-Con an outlier. While I’m sure there are other cons that have such requirements now, I can’t think of one. (Feel free to mention any in the comments below). This year I’ve attended both Indiana Comic-Con (which is in the Indiana Convention Center, the same venue as Gen-Con) and G-Fest (which is held in Chicago, a city that only recently relaxed its stringent COVID restrictions), neither of which required vax cards. And guess what? Everything went fine. No one said anything one way or the other. Nobody died. The attendees just enjoyed themselves. Gen-Con could’ve compromised, as many venues and shows have done in the last year. A negative COVID test within three days of the con? Sure. A mask mandate? Fine. Social distancing and other precautions? Understandable. But a vax card requirement is a bridge too far.

I’ve debated if I still would’ve attended Gen-Con if I was vaxxed. While I can’t say for sure, I think I would’ve canceled on principle and as a sign of solidarity with friends who couldn’t or wouldn’t attend because of this decision.

After the success of last year’s Gen-Con despite reasonable restrictions, this vax card requirement is a baffling, presumptive, and seemingly prejudicial decision. It’s bad for PR. While I don’t wish failure on this year’s con, I do hope that the powers-that-be at Gen-Con corporate get plenty of pushback about this and drop the requirement for next year’s convention. I’ve spoken with other Gen-Con fans who’ve been unfairly excluded by this. We aren’t going to get a COVID shot just to participate in “the four best days of gaming.” There are other cons who don’t have these restrictions who will be happy to have our time and money. It’s not 2020 anymore. We’ve moved on.

Gen-Con should, too.

NEW BOOK – ‘ZORSAM AND THE GOD WHO DEVOURS’

The cover art for the book.

It’s been a long time since I’ve posted anything of note on this website. I’ll say it’s a New Year’s Resolution to remedy that. So, let’s start that off with a mandatory post about my newly published book, Zorsam and the God Who Devours!

Some years ago in a wonderful place called Story, Indiana, a bunch of my college writer friends and I made a pilgrimage to have a weekend retreat in a big cabin. Amidst some sightseeing and tabletop gaming, we all sat down and discussed doing a big year-long project together we called “The Pulp Fiction Project” (the “literary genre,” not the Tarantino movie). We listed several types of stories that you’d see in old pulp magazines, including space western, monster story (which led to Destroyer), and “barbarian story.” My friend Nick Hayden chose to write that last one. Over the course of the next year, our goal was to have multiple 30,000-word novellas in the style of old dime store novels. Each would have three writers who took four months each to write about 10,000 words a piece before passing it on to another writer whose name would be drawn from a hat. It fell to Aaron Brosman second and finally to me.

It sat on the proverbial shelf (or rather, hard drive) for years until Nick attempted to get it published with a publishing house he was with a few years ago. That didn’t work out, so I contacted Wild Hunt Press, who jumped at the chance to publish some sword and sorcery.

What’s this book about? In a nutshell: a barbarian cooler than Conan.

You read that right.

Here’s the back cover copy:

Zorsam is a mighty and savage warrior born in an undreamed of and unrecorded age, filled with strange kingdoms, fierce warriors, dark magick, nightmarish monstrosities, and terrifying deities. Among the latter is the dreaded Manrix, the God Who Devours, a bestial deity who demands the sacrifice of young female virgins to keep his appetite sated and appeased. His most powerful follower in that bygone era is the brutal King Margruxks, the ruler of the much-respected kingdom of Glaur, whose latest intended sacrifice is a young woman named Asundi.

Zorsam is soon to learn, through a deadly series of trials he is put through by an avatar of Death itself, that the sacrificial girl is one of his tribe, and he becomes determined to do the unthinkable and take on his greatest trial yet: invading the lands of Glaur, oppose King Margruxks and his deadly minions, and dare to deny Manrix his demanded offering by rescuing Asundi.

Among King Margruxk’s soldiers are the brothers Zaduk and Fria, unconquerable warriors who control the forces of fire and ice respectively, which will more than ensure Zorsam a challenge that shall truly earn him the title of one of the greatest warriors of all time — if he survives. For even if he gets through this incredible gauntlet, he must then face the deadly sword of King Margruxks himself, and ultimately, the power of the God Who Devours.

The blood-stained saga of Zorsam begins here, and it is brought to you by no less than three authors who have made the sword and sorcery genre their passion.

It’s available on Amazon as an eBook right now, but the paperback is coming soon!

If schedules allow, I’m hoping to do a livestream with both Nick and Aaron on my YouTube channel to discuss the book and the process of writing it. Stay tuned!

In meantime, start the New Year off with a new book!

The Journal of the Plague Fortnight, Days 4-5: Keeping Busy

I missed a day, so this entry will detail my first weekend in quarantine/lockdown.

Saturday I returned to BioLife, where I was able to donate. They’ve told me that plasma is desperately needed now, especially since the number of donors has dropped with people staying home. Just because there’s a pandemic going on doesn’t mean other medical issues have ceased. Also, they told me that there is some preliminary research that says plasma from people who’ve recovered from coronavirus may help those who are suffering from it. That may not hold up after more research, but it’s a good sign.

After returning to the Fortress of Solitude, I set up my podcast equipment to interview Eric Elliott, the mastermind behind the fan comic Batman Meets Godzilla, which is based on an unmade film back in the 1960s that would’ve featured the Adam West Batman battling the Big G himself. No joke. That interview should drop April 15. We had a fun time nerding out about comics and superheroes.

After lunch and more UltraSeven with Jarod, I got back to grading papers. I was determined to get them all done that day, if for no other reason than to do right by my students since we aren’t meeting in the classroom anymore. Sadly, I let myself get distracted (again) and got started a bit later than I wanted to. I spent the entire afternoon slaving over their papers, but even at 10-15 minutes a paper, I didn’t feel like I was burning through them fast enough, especially since I got a few late submissions the day before. It got to the point where I just couldn’t force myself to get going and took a break for thirty minutes to watch some YouTube videos. That left me rejuvenated. I wanted to have dinner with Jarod, but his eating schedule is so wacky, we ended up not doing it. That break lasted longer than I wanted it to. I plowed through what was left of the papers and had them done by late evening.

I punctuated my day watching a cheesy 1994 action film starring Roddy Piper and Sonny Chiba called Immortal Kombat on YouTube while giving live commentary with friends on Facebook messenger. The movie was kinda boring in the middle and had too many subplots, but the beginning and end were fun.

The next morning I “attended” church at home through their livestream. I was working a bit during it, though. I recently became the webmaster for their website, so I was updating the site while the livestream was going on. While I’m glad they’re doing this, it isn’t the same as actually being there. I miss the community.

Lunch and a double helping of UltraSeven followed. Then I spent some time writing a script for an upcoming podcast episode. But during that writing session, some friends asked me to play some video games with them online, and given that chatting with them while playing has become another avenue for me to connect with the outside world in all this madness, I took the offer. All I have to say is if you’re playing The King of Fighters XIV and meet a player named “Bumba Chunga,” you better bring you’re A-game. I finished that, but then another friend invited me to play after dinner, so I did.

Here’s the stream video my friend Sergio took of that session. It starts in the middle of my match. Sadly, you can’t hear my side of the chat.

By then it was close to 9pm. I still had to finish that script and do some reading for school, so I spent the next few hours doing exactly that. It wasn’t the most productive time, but hey, I needed a Sabbath.

What’d you do during your first weekend in quarantine/lockdown? Comment below!

The Journal of the Plague Fortnight, Day 3: What Artists Contribute

My day started with a trip to BioLife to donate plasma. I was late (I’ve gotten into a bad habit of doing that), and with the coronavirus scare, the check-in procedures have been reordered. Today, unfortunately, my protein levels were too low to donate. It was the first time in months this has happened. But as Scarlet O’Hara said, “Tomorrow is another day.”

With no excuse to be out of the Fortress of Solitude, I returned. First order of business: I finished editing the trailer for Kaiju Quarantine. I had to bug my fellow podcasters to send me their lines. One recorded the wrong lines and, for whatever reason, his audio file was a garbled mess in Audacity. So, I had him send me a new file. Despite Audacity giving me issues with file locations (an issue that concerns me), I put the trailer together and posted it in my podcast’s feed. I shared it with my fellow podcasters for them to disseminate.

That brought me to lunch and more UltraSeven with Jarod.

My plan was to spend the rest of the afternoon grading papers—and the distraction issues plagued me again (no pun intended). I didn’t get through all of my students’ papers. I don’t know what it is with me. Perhaps I’ve allowed myself to think I have more time than I do. Maybe the lack of structure is making me careless. Conceivably (hey, I needed a synonym, okay?), I’ve been away from school for too long, and now with everything turned upside down, I haven’t found a new rhythm yet.

(Random aside: Has anyone noticed how weird the word “rhythm” is? It has no true vowel and is a weird combination of consonants).

It might be more necessary than ever for me to keep myself off my phone, especially now that it’s become my only real source of social interaction.

While eating dinner, I watched a bit of Super Sentai Jetman on Tokushoutsu through the PlutoTV app. Every time I see it I’m shocked at how bipolar it is. One scene it’s being a silly teen rom-com, the next a hero is slashing his palm to save his girlfriend. And this was a kids’ show in Japan! Talk about cultural differences!

I punctuated my day with a new endeavor: video game streaming. I broadcast my playthrough of the game Override: Mech City Brawl through my PS4 to my podcast’s YouTube channel. It was one way I’ve tried to provide some much-needed entertainment for people who are stuck in lockdown/quarantine. I’ve realized that what artists/creatives provide in troubled times like these is exactly that: entertainment. We create an oasis in the desert of uncertainty. Listen to, read, or watch us to forget your worries, if only for a short time. It helps fight off the depression. It’s a vastly underappreciated service. People don’t realize how important it is until they desperately need it.

Here’s the video of my stream, if you’re interested in seeing it:

I may do it again. I (foolishly) tried to play the game on hard mode, so I wasn’t able to finish the campaign even after four hours. I think I’ll move on to Shadow of the Colossus after this.

What did you do to pass the time today? Let me know in the comments below!

The Journal of the Plague Fortnight, Day 2: Schoolwork, Schoolwork, and More…Gaming?!

I don’t know if it was a mistake or not, but I slept in today. Then again, I was up later than I expected last night. During my late breakfast, I decided to start a new anime since I recently finished Code Geass. So, I did what I should’ve done a long time ago: I started RoboTech, a classic of anime. Let me tell you, in just one episode, I found myself reveling in the ‘80s anime goodness.

This was my first week back to university after the extended spring break, and today was the first post-coronapocalypse deadline for my students’ paper drafts. From about 11am until 6pm, most of my time was spent grading papers. I had “online office hours” from 11am-1pm, which included a videoconference Skype call with one of my students. That was different. I took a lunch break at 1pm and watched UltraSeven with Jarod.

Unfortunately, I battled distractions throughout the rest of the afternoon. Friends kept messaging me. Amusing things kept happening on Twitter. I kept wondering if it would’ve been easier if I was on campus, but I’m not sure. What was happening probably wouldn’t have happened if not for the current crisis, I’m sure.

One of the downsides of being a writer is the constant “what ifs…?”

Regardless, I managed to get through all of my first class’ papers. Tomorrow I do my second class’ papers.

On a whim, I decided to try streaming Street Fighter V on my YouTube channel as practice for when I do it on my podcast’s channel tomorrow (Friday) at 7pm EST. I was joined by several friends, including Sergio (who played against me), Josh (who commented), and Mike (who was on chat for ten minutes).

Here are the videos (with apologies for my mic issues at first):

I think I might try to make this a more common occurrence.

After that, I got to work on the trailer for Kaiju Quarantine, a big watch party being organized by me and several of my fellow podcasters. (More on that later).

All the while, I never left the Fortress of Solitude. I guess that makes me a good citizen.

I will admit this lockdown has made me try new things, and I’m finding that I like them.

What’d you do today to pass the time in lockdown? What new things, if any, have you tried?

The Journal of the Plague Fortnight, Day 1: Reputation, Lockdown, and Excuses to Leave

The foggy scene outside my apartment on day one of the Indiana lockdown. (Photo by Nathan Marchand).

As I mentioned on my social media, with my home state of Indiana in lockdown and my university going to online only classes, I’ve decided to increase my creative output to entertain (and hopefully enlighten) all of you True Believers while in quarantine. We could all use some relief, and this is one way I can help with that.

When I wrote my blog last week, I hesitated to put in my political commentary. I make no secret of my political leanings (I’m a conservative), but I don’t make a habit of broadcasting them to the world because it always invites trouble. That’s the climate we live in now. But I left it in because it was part of my frustration. Predictably, I was accused of being flippant, propagating misinformation, and not taking the situation seriously. I ended up adding a “retraction” of sorts to the blog and posting it as an addendum. This came after I did some more reading and learned a few things I didn’t know before about coronavirus.

The criticism ignited an old fear that has dug deeper roots in recent years: perception is reality when it should be truth. In other words, the actions and decisions of others have more control over my life than I do. I could be objectively qualified for, say, a job, but the employer could still not select me. In the case of my blog, I didn’t mean to spread misinformation or offend anyone. Given that I’m something of a public figure (and the internet is vicious), damage to my reputation could cost me big time. I’ve seen the destruction wrought by gossip. I know firsthand how ungracious people can be. That’s why I went into “damage control mode” to mitigate the problem. I should’ve known everyone, including myself, is on edge with everything happening. It’s only natural to respond defensively. I stay up-to-date with the latest reports on the crisis, but there’s a lot of unknowns out there. Humans fear the unknown more than most things. That’s why coronavirus is terrifying but the flu isn’t.

Sadly, I saw the internet tear someone else apart this week over this. J.D. Lees, the editor of G-Fan magazine and the organizer for G-Fest, sparked the controversy of the week in the kaiju fan community when he posted coronavirus stats on the event’s Twitter page. Yes, it was a bad PR move, but I’ve rarely seen such instant hate in this fandom. People called him a “clown” and a “villain” and said they would cancel their magazine subscriptions and their G-Fest tickets. I know J.D., so I know he meant no harm, which is why I did try to stem the hate. That and my recent experience made me sympathetic to his plight. At least no one bit my head off for it.

So, now almost everywhere I would go is closed. School, the dance studio, bookstores. Heck, even my church had to start livestreaming services. To say I feel isolated would be an understatement. It makes me glad my brother Jarod moved in with me or else I would die of loneliness. I’ve distanced myself from online communities to focus on real-life relationships, and now they’re all I have for the time being.

At least I was able to do some work for InstaCart, and they seem to be staying in operation. At this point, I’ll take any excuse to go outside.

On my first day of quarantine, I drove to BioLife to donate plasma like I normally do. The stuff is desperately needed, and it’s good money. Appropriately, fog as thick as peanut butter blanketed the city at 9AM. It made me think of the people’s blindness and how fog would deter travel. Beyond that, I spent the day raiding my overfilled cupboards, watching UltraSeven with Jarod, doing schoolwork, catching up on my TV viewing, and gaming online with my friend Bill.

One of the goals on my whiteboard is, “Add more adventure to your life.”

That just got more challenging.

What are you doing to pass the time in self-quarantine? Comment below!

Coronapocalypse Now

EDIT: This blog has been edited since it was first posted. After some discussions on social media and a little more research, I realized it had some inaccuracies. The blog was also meant to be a bit tongue-in-cheek, and once again I’ve learned that doesn’t always communicate on the internet. The biggest deletion pertained to the hysteria being manufactured to hurt the Trump Administration going into the election. I had no idea this was something started by President Trump on Twitter. It was a conclusion I came to on my own. I am a self-proclaimed “Trump agnostic,” meaning I’m not part of either the Never Trumpers or the president’s cult of personality, which is why I tick everyone off. (I do think someone needs to take Twitter away from him, though). However, I do stand by my assertion that the media is stoking the hysteria because, as Tim Constantine wrote for The Washington Times, “fear sells.” Since this is new (“novel,” which means “new,” is part of the disease’s name, after all) and relatively unknown, people fear it even though there are diseases out there that are far more common and far more likely to kill someone. Humans fear the unknown. However, I also know human nature well enough to know that there will be those who will try to take advantage of the situation for their own benefit, and that’s especially true for those in power. That’s the big reason why I think the hysteria needs to stop, which is the point I wanted to make with this blog. We need to be safe and watch out for those who are the most vulnerable among us (my younger brother has a form of asthma, so I know), but turning the world upside down like the Black Plague has suddenly returned is an overreaction. My apologies for not making that clear in the first published draft of this blog. (EDIT ENDS)

For the first few months of 2020, the coronavirus (or Covid-19 as the media is now calling it) was China’s problem. It was nasty, but it was “over there,” to quote a goofy Superman comic. It was an issue for the elderly and immunodeficient (spellcheck doesn’t like that word for some reason), but so was the flu.

But like black mold creeping along your floor, the disease kept spreading until it hit the U.S. California, if I remember correctly. Then Washington State. I figured it would be contained. The CDC reacted quickly. But then it cropped up in other states. Again, I didn’t think much of it. Until a man in Indianapolis was diagnosed with it. Within a few days, another man in the county next door to me was infected.

By that point, as the old saying goes, all hell broke loose.

State and local governments started mandating that large gatherings be postponed. Restaurants and schools closed. Movies had their releases or productions delayed. Sporting events were canceled. People were told to stay home in self-quarantine.

Businesses are losing gobs of money—unless you’re Clorox or Netflix. They’re swimming in money. Hand sanitizer is liquid gold now. I saw a listing on eBay where someone was selling four 30-ounce bottles of the stuff for $500. If I’d known, I’d have stockpiled it and started a black market.

At least The Babylon Bee has had a heyday with this pandemic panic.

Not only am I going to Walmart and grocery stores and finding the shelves empty (thankfully, I have enough toilet paper to last a while), but it has affected my schooling and my job. My university has decided to extend its spring break a week and make all classes totally online for the rest of the semester. I’m taking two as a grad student and teaching two as a graduate teaching assistant. I’ve taken a few online classes before (and didn’t like it), but I’ve never taught one. Now I have to find a way to adapt for the last six weeks or so of the semester. And I’d just started to get to know my students and looked forward to seeing them. So, my extended spring break has become an extended working spring break since I now have to figure out how to re-jigger my classes. Meanwhile, I don’t know what the classes I’m taking will look like. One professor is totally old school, with the only online stuff he does being e-mail. The other professor has one foot in old school and one in new school. I’m more confused than a dog after he catches a car.

Elsewhere, the ballroom dance studio I attend has started making students not touch each other in group classes and has canceled their Friday night parties until further notice.

Now I don’t know if I’ll make it to G-Fest or Gen-Con this summer.

I thought my small church would be fine, but Gov. Holcomb has decreased the size of allowed public gatherings from 250 to 50. Now President Trump is recommending it be limited to 10. Even my church wouldn’t be able to meet if that was in place.

With all this mandated “social distancing,” I’ve joked this is introverts trying to get revenge on extroverts. Or its social engineering to wipe out extroverts.

You’d think I’d revel in that, but I’m a freak among the freaks: I’m an extrovert. I drive my fellow nerds and writers crazy.

Now when I make jokes about this or point out the hysteria, I get pushback on social media. Someone even said I was being flippant. All I could do was shake my head.

I’m not saying people shouldn’t be concerned. I’m not saying they shouldn’t take precautions. But this is a disease that, at most, has a 3% fatality rate (and that’s if you’re old or have an outstanding medical condition). If this was something both highly contagious and truly deadly, I could understand the fear, but people are treating Covid-19 like it’s the T-virus. I get it: hospitals could be overwhelmed with an influx of patients. However, I’ve heard most people who get it don’t show symptoms. That being said, it doesn’t justify all the freaking out.

Well, that’s enough of me complaining about my unimportant first world problems.

In the meantime, if you want some new books to binge read while in self-quarantine, I have plenty. They’re all on Amazon, which means they can be delivered to your door so you won’t have to go out. (Although, one features a bio-weapon plague, but maybe it will be cathartic for you).

Also, I have 12 episodes of a kaiju (giant monster) podcast you could binge listen. It’s called The Monster Island Film Vault.

Yes, I’m not beyond using this for shameless self-promotion. That’s why it’s shameless. 😛

What do you think of the whole situation? Is it legitimate or is it hysteria?

Writing, Podcasting, and the Shiny New Thing

The pen or the microphone?

This week I begin my penultimate semester of grad school. Part of that will be writing a brand new standalone novel as my creative writing thesis. Amidst all of that, though, I am also producing a twice-monthly podcast, The Monster Island Film Vault. The irony is I’ve noticed for a while that it’s become easier for me to do anything related to the podcast than my writing.

I’m annoyed by this. Some of it is a time management issue, but I think it goes deeper than that. It certainly isn’t a lack of passion or ideas (heck, both of my grad school classes this semester are writing classes). I’ve long joked that I have more ideas than I have years left to write. I think this shift happened for two reasons: imminent deadlines and immediate praise.

My podcast’s episodes drop on the second and fourth Wednesdays of each month. Yes, that’s a self-imposed schedule, but from what I’ve read, the audience comes to expect one to keep his schedule. This keeps me on my toes and makes me carve out time for research, recording, and editing. Do I perhaps try to get each episode finished sooner than it needs to be? Oftentimes. Part of that comes from overestimating how long it will take. Other times I make excuses like, “I can get more done editing an episode for 30 minutes than I will writing for 30 minutes.” It’s illogical, but humans aren’t always logical. (Sorry, Spock!). It simply feels easier at points to podcast than write (despite the podcast requiring a lot of writing). I’ve found myself worried that I’ve lost my first love as a creative.

The second reason is harder to shake off: immediate praise. That isn’t to say that glowing reviews started coming in within an hour of my first episode dropping or whatnot. However, as more episodes were posted and I promoted the show, more people listened and told me they loved it. The positive reviews came faster and more frequently for the podcast than for any of my books (and it’s not like I don’t promote the heck out of my books and don’t have readers wanting more of them). There’s a lot I could say about why my podcast seems to be making a splash in the kaiju/Godzilla fandom, but those ultimately feed into my need for affirmation. I don’t consider this a weakness; no, it’s one of the famous “5 Love Languages.” Hearing and reading positive feedback with every episode incentivizes me to continue. I think this is why I eventually burned out with my YouTube channel: I wasn’t getting that feedback as fast or frequently. The challenge now becomes making sure the praise doesn’t become like a drug. I want to make this podcast because it’s fun and because I want to be a positive and unique voice in the kaiju fandom. I can’t let this—or anything, for that matter—become a crutch for my ego.

Aye, there’s the rub.

All of these combine to make something that’s new and exciting, so I’m still in the thick of the novelty of this project. That amplifies the excitement: it’s my “shiny new thing” right now. Lord help me when I come off that high!

There is something to be said about writers doing podcasts, though.

As a creative, what do you do to keep your work from becoming a crutch for your ego? Let’s discuss it in the comments below!

The Rise of Skywalker: A Lesson in People Pleasing

The poster for the film.

Happy New Decade, True Believers!

Between grad school, my podcast, and writing, it’s been a challenge to blog consistently. I’m still endeavoring to amend that. Regardless, I’d be remiss if I didn’t talk about a certain little movie called Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker. Perhaps you’ve heard of it? This won’t be a review, though.

I was one of the fifty percent of Star Wars fans who liked The Last Jedi. I wrote a blog refuting some of the often outrageous criticisms the film received. Little did I know that the movie would shatter the fandom.

Again.

Except this time it was like an atomic bomb.

The people who hated The Last Jedi hated it with the burning passion of a Sith. Anyone who dared like it or defend it was declared a “filthy casual.” I’ve written on the cult-like nature of the “hardcore fans,” so I won’t rehash it here, but suffice it to say, it seems Disney and J.J. Abrams listened to those angry fans, and because the studio likes money, those complaints influenced some creative decisions. As a result, Rise of Skywalker’s score on the (infamous) Rotten Tomatoes is the opposite of The Last Jedi: critics are lukewarm while users are praising it.

Did I hate it? No, I didn’t. I was thrilled seeing it the first time despite some concerns it would retcon The Last Jedi, but after seeing it a second time, the luster has faded. It has its problems, for sure, and while I don’t think it undoes The Last Jedi, I can see what Abrams and Disney did to placate the Star Wars mob.

(WARNING: SPOILERS AHEAD!)

Emperor Mastermind: Palpatine did it. Yep. He was behind the First Order. He created Snoke in a vat and used him as a puppet ruler, I guess. Most likely he used the same technology to keep himself alive by cloning bodies. Maybe. It’s more implied than explained. As has been common with this trilogy, this is similar to the original Expanded Universe (now Legends), wherein the Emperor transferred his soul into cloned bodies using the Force. The problem is, while I knew going in that Palpatine would be back, he appears within five minutes instead of building toward the reveal. Giving that time to develop would’ve helped to make his involvement more natural. As it stands, he seems to come out of nowhere despite the opening crawl telling the audience his voice was heard a year before. It could be argued his inclusion was an appeal to nostalgia.

Rey (Skywalker): I said before that I liked that Rey’s parents were nobodies. Rise doesn’t walk that back, per se, but it clumsily qualifies it. They chose to be nobodies. Rey’s father was Palpatine’s son (which raises a slew of questions about what woman would be crazy enough to have his child), and they hid Rey to protect her from the Emperor. While it isn’t one of the theories many fans espoused—like that she was Luke’s daughter, Han and Leia’s daughter, or Obi-Wan Kenobi’s granddaughter—it could still be argued that it plays into the old attitude that one must have a special lineage to be special. Admittedly, the same could be said of Anakin Skywalker and Luke Skywalker, who were a slave and a farmboy, respectively, and learned later of their special heritage. This trope is also used in other fantasy stories. That being said, it almost seems like a concession to fans who didn’t want to accept the fact that their theories about her parentage were wrong, and that the Force chose her and empowered her. It sounds a bit elitist, honestly, for them to think only certain families can use the Force. If anything, this may have been done in response to the criticisms that Rey is a Mary Sue (which I will admit is a bit difficult to refute). However, it does work as a character arc for Rey because she is trying to form her own identity throughout the Sequel Trilogy, so I’ll give Abrams and company credit for that.

Rose Tico: This character was sidelined in this story. Maybe the filmmakers weren’t sure what to do with her (although I heard one YouTuber suggest that she should’ve become an ambassador for the Resistance), but on the surface it seems like they gave her the Jar-Jar Binks treatment by keeping her out of most of the movie. Many in the fandom branded her the face of The Last Jedi, calling the character a “diversity hire,” and harassed actress Kelly Marie Tran so much, she deleted all her social media. (This isn’t the first time this has happened: the fandom gave 10-year-old Jake Lloyd, who played Anakin, and Ahmed Best, who played Jar-Jar, the same treatment after The Phantom Menace). I’ve no way of knowing for sure, but again, it sure looks that way.

(SPOILERS END)

These were a few things that came to mind. I may think of others later. It doesn’t ruin the film for me, but honestly, my favorite of this trilogy is still The Last Jedi for its boldness. (You can stone me later). Admittedly, Abrams was in an unenviable position with the end of the previous movie. Maybe he was trying to do the best he could. Much like George Lucas, they made it up as they went. There are famous writers who’ve made careers out of that (like Stephen King), but it does come with its own perils.

Unfortunately, the reactions to this is yet another sign that no one hates Star Wars like Star Wars fans. Any new media in the franchise is automatically divisive.

(Unless it’s The Mandalorian, for whatever reason. I guess Baby Yoda fixes everything).

I get it: it’s Star Wars. It’s a big deal to many people. Some even say it’s modern mythology, and by messing with it, it’s doing harm to the culture psyche. But perhaps we’ve elevated this franchise a bit too high. It really is to the point of being a religion. Given that ancient mythologies were originally religious tales, that’s not surprising. Perhaps this is a sign that people need to find their meaning in something that isn’t controlled by the whims of a corporate entertainment empire. Just sayin’.

What did you think of The Rise of Skywalker? Did it continue the ruination of Star Wars, or is it a case study in people pleasing? Why or why not?