In Defense of Extroverts

You may find it strange that I’m blogging about this. Marti Olsen Laney, author of The Introvert Advantage, would have you believe that we live in an “extroverted world” since one in four people are introverts.

Then I, somehow, made friends in most of them. Seriously, most of my friends are on the introvert side of the spectrum. I have no idea how or why that happened.

It’s these sorts of statements that upset me. >:(

Sadly, I’ve also known pretentious introverts who did nothing but sing the praises of introversion—and, by extension, themselves—to the point of negatively stereotyping extroverts (insensitive, unintelligent, etc. Heck, one introvert I know even called them “vampires” since they re-energize being around other people). There are numerous articles saying that introverts are attractive and sexy—one even comparing them to James Bond—using descriptions that I thought were what any man should be in order to attract women. While they don’t come out and say it—and I admit I could be reading into this—the implication seems to be that introverts make for superior spouses. Perhaps even superior human beings.

So, while I apparently live in an extroverted world, I’ve run in circles that derided extroverts or at least my extroverted tendencies. I’ve often hated my own personality because of it. I wasn’t allowed to get animated or boisterous: these were always unattractive social faux pas, no matter the context (I was even accused of being homosexual because of it, since, apparently, straight men are always introverted [note the sarcasm]). I can recall playing video games with a particularly pretentious introverted “friend” (who later stabbed me in the back) telling me the excited squeal I made when I pulled off something crazy was a sound that was meant only for the bedroom (I’m sure you get what he meant). Disliking loneliness was a weakness. Being talkative was a sin. It even seemed at times that introversion was the “more Christian” personality to have.

Stop it with the stereotypes! Extroverts (and introverts, for that matter) are far more nuanced than many people realize. Just read this article on extroverts. It dispels the myths. Just because extroverts like being around people doesn’t mean they can’t stand being alone. Extroverts are human beings, and that means they sometimes lead some time to themselves. The opposite is true of introverts: humans are social creatures, and studies have shown that they are happier when connecting with each other, so introverts can’t hide in their rooms forever. One is not superior to the other. Anyone who says so is a narcissist trying to obliquely brag about how awesome he thinks he is.

Maybe this blog, in the long run, will serve less as a defense of extroverts and more a defense of my own personality. I admit that I take it personally any disparaging things said about extroverts. As you can see, it’s something that didn’t happen in a vacuum.

It’s time extroverts and introverts alike learned to appreciate one another and learn from one another. We’re all wonderful people with much to offer. We are equals.

Don’t silence the extroverts—silence the prejudice.

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